at the beginning of the month i proposed an idea and suggested we make this month a "november to remember". just a time to go and do you - to mainly spend some time reflecting upon YOU - before the hustle and bustle of the holiday season comes rolling in. so often i think that we rush around too much on the day to day and never really have that 5 minutes for "me time".
i learned a very valuable lesson this past month, something about myself - that at the moment i was really pissed off to learn. but with time , (yes even still to this very moment) i am beyond grateful to have learned. i guess having been dealt some crappy cards, you just play the game and you see where it takes you: maybe you win, maybe you lose, OR maybe you end up in a chinese restaurant! WTF?! yeah i know what you're thinking! please allow me to explain... i know from personal experience that every day has a headline. something is always happening, and somethings are even earth shattering. however i'm grace under fire, taking ALL things in stride - me and these so called "headlines" took out against the world. i kept having these absurd moments of quiet reflection, conversation and sheer panic on the down low. then one day reality hit me, HARD!
so there i was, during my "november to remember" doing what i told everyone else to do! spent some time reflecting! then i uncovered my mysteries, dug a little deeper and i learned that, (ugh deep breaths.... ) i have - high expectations. hmm, some of you may think that isn't a bad thing, some of you may think it is a terrible thing. let me be the first to say it is DAMN well, a GREAT THING!
have you ever heard the story of the girl who went into the chinese restaurant and begged, bitched and moaned, screamed for the manager asking for spaghetti and meatballs? well obviously, we know she didn't get that. she has 2 options, she can leave and go to the italian place down the street and get what she wants or she can stay there, and learn to like lo-mein. either way the decision is hers, she has to decide... and when making choices in this manner, in the heat of the moment so often it can lead to a valuable lesson. you learn a lot about yourself when pitted with choices.
let me say that i am the girl in the chinese restaurant - or at least i was until i learned about my HIGH EXPECTATIONS... i didn't want either dish, so what did that say about me. what is wrong with me, i want too much and i want unattainable or impossible things?! since when in life is striving for something BAD? oh my god, i thought, i'm doomed and i'll have to re route my patterns, change my ways blah blah blah! and that couldn't be farther from the truth. AND THANK YOU BABY JESUS! it isn't bad and it isn't good, IT JUST IS. its what makes being "me" unique. it is my headline, that i uncovered during my "november to remember" that i will carry with me for the rest of my life. and i'll continue to explore it. maybe now with my explanations for those mystery's, life will be smoother and those absurd moments of quiet reflection will not be left in panic!
my message started out as a small effort just to give a gal some extra time for herself, even if none of you ever participated in "november to remember" maybe you can take a part of my story with you... uncover your own expectations now and see how they reflect your everyday life. make your own headlines! *and for the record - i left the chinese place, and i went out into the parking lot and started my own fun, because that's just ME. and would you expect anything less?!;)
